There are two schools of thought when it comes to motherhood. We can choose to either be the b*tch or the best friend. I aim to be an appropriate combination of the two. I want to be firm, but fair- and a little fun. Like Albus Dumbledore. Unfortunately, I’m more McGonagall.
This gets magnified when my baby and I are around her grandparents or great grandparents.
So me and my daughter’s family were all at a restaurant last night.
Me, being firm but fair and a little fun: Here’s the kid’s menu and two crayons. Want to color Mommy a picture? 😀
My Daughter: Yeah! *Colors*
Then she drops one of the two crayons. Me, not wanting to deny my belly fruit the luxury of two crayons, bends over and picks up the crayon and hands it to her.
Me: Here you go, you cute little piece of pie. 🙂
Meanwhile her grandfather is just enjoying her company. It’s a great time.
Then my little Crumbsnatcher drops the crayon again. But it’s a special occasion and maintaining relationships are more important than enforcing arbitrary rules.
So I go for the happy medium.
Me: Uh-oh! I’ll get the crayon for you one more time, but don’t drop it again or else it stays on the floor.
She’s at the age where she’s conscious of things. She has a basic idea of right and wrong. And she knows my voice tones. There are 3 levels based on the severity of my baby’s behavior
- Misdemeanor Responses: “Strudelcake, what did Mommy say about that?”
- Warning Responses: Do it one more time, little girl. One. More. Time.
- Felony Responses: “Oh, hell no!”
In general, the severity of my daughter’s actions are inversely proportional to the number of words used in response.
She deliberately dropped the crayon for a third time.
Me: Well, I guess you just gonna color with one crayon then. Better think of some orange things because green is gone.
Then she dramatically reaches towards the floor for the green crayon. Tugging on her grandfather’s heart strings.
Now, my baby is a master manipulator. She’s so cute and she knows how to work it.
Sidenote: Any other mothers think your kid(s) deliberately try you in public just to see how much they can get away with? Sometimes I think my daughter is an evil toddler genuis.
So her grandfather picks up the crayon and she just beams. I feel terrible like, “What kind of mother am I? Punishing this innocent child for making a mistake. I need to lighten up.” 😦
Then she does it a forth time and her dad takes the crayons like, “No more of that.”
He saw it all and intervened. Then I look at my daughter like, “See I knew your sneaky ass was full aware! I *knew* it.”
Little does she know, I’m gonna be sticking to the 2Ps: Prayer and Punishment.
Can’t afford to second-guess myself when I have a daughter that can apparently sense weakness >.<
Kids push you to your limits of faith and sanity. #parenthood