As Time Flies

As time flies,
Life implies
She complies
With its lies.

Darkened skies,
Teary eyes,
Choking sighs,
All the, “Whys,”
Bring despise.

She replies:
*Seeks demise*
God denies.
Real life faith,
In disguise.

So she tries,
And applies
His Advice
To revise
Her surmise.

As time flies,
Each tear dries,
Faith defies
Life’s chastise.

*Rae

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My Prejudice and Prayer

Recently I was confronted with the realization I am prejudiced against a certain class of individuals. Am I proud of it? No.

But the holiday season really pushes my fear front and center. It seems like everyone and their Momma is out shopping. That means more populated stores.

I’ll be in Publix minding my own business. Trying to decide what sushi plate to buy. Then there they are. You can tell the worst ones by their hair and kids.

I never judge a book by its cover.

Unless the book has a bob hairstyle, a kid on the dance team, just got back from a PTA meeting, and almost runs me over with their buggy.

People who walk in the store like they own the place. Completely cold to the welfare of others. With a frigid look that just yells, “I will choke you to death right here in this Publix if you come between me and my son’s peanut-free peanut butter.”

Or they give you an empty, dead inside glance as they buy cosmetics for a daughter that is one house party away from being on Teen Mom.

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How I Cope

woman walking in front of a sunrise

These past two weeks, I’ve been in an episode. For those unfamiliar with the term, an “episode” is when depression-prone individuals fall into a temporary bout of darkness.
I’m finally clawing my way back out. And let me just say, this last episode was something severe. Anyway, the Lord saw me through it. As use.

Now that I’m a bit more clear-headed, I want to share some of the activities that are helping me out of this pit of pity and hopelessness:

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MEpiphany

Due to the craziness of the start of Fall Semester, I missed my appointment with the psychiatrist.

As a result, I didn’t have a prescription waiting for me after I went through the last battle.

Note: I thought I typed bottle but during the re-read, I see I put battle. That’s even better.

I am going to get that appointment and prescription taken care of this week, though. I know I need to be on medication, because I get to the point where I can’t even stand being around my own emotionally unstable ass. >.<

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Undeserving, but Oh So Grateful

I am humbled by all of you who follow realasthestreets.org because I’m shamefully mediocre. Just a human whose ambition far exceed her talent. A sinner Christian with more vice than virtue. I know my About Page says I enjoy encouraging others- which is true.

But I’ve found so much encouragement from you who leave me heartfelt words of support. My post, “More than I Can Bear,” was an excerpt of some of the difficulties we experience as Christians. Those moments where the enemy gets a foothold.

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One of Those Nights

I’m drinking an Amaretto Sour (heavy on Ameretto, light on sour) and watching For Colored Girls.

Tonight is going to be one of those nights.

When my old foe, Depression, attempts to pull me into the dark abyss of self-pity and hopelessness this is the Bible verse I cling to:

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death, or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. (Revelation 21:4)

I’m sharing this for all those with tears, pain, and heartache.

Pray, persist, and prepare for a time when all this will be a forgotten memory.

*Rae