Stay in Control

So last night I prayed for humility. I knew it was a prayer that needed to be said because I prayed each word with a little bite.

Like my ego was saying, “I don’t need to be more humble. I’m perfect as I am and humility is for p-” and my spirit was like, “Shut the hell up, ego! I’m tryna keep us out of the eternal pit! *Clears throat* As I was saying Lord, help me to tame my arrogant ways.”

And, yes, I recognized the possibility that I may suffer from schizophrenia. But that’s irrelevant.

The point is, I’ve started telling myself, “no.” Yesterday I got home after work, ready to chow down on some lit sushi. But then I realized I wanted it too much. So I decided to fridge the food, shower, and straighten up a bit. Then ate.

Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control. (Proverbs 25:28)

It’s pretty empowering to feel in control of your own behaviors. Spirit leading the body and not the other way around.

Stay in control,

*Rae

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Shades of Gray

We laugh, smile, pretend it’s okay.

Like my trust you didn’t betray.

You text, “I care,” to my dismay,

I want to believe your display,

The gentle care bear you portray.

“Just for one night,” you ask to stay.

“I know you, though,” so I delay.

“Past is past, I’m different today.”

You come on soft, I start to sway.

Next thing I know, you’re on the way.

And I’m a feminine cliché,

Living my life in shades of gray.

Oh, Hamburgers!

a hamburger

photo credit: freeimages.com/robert owen-wahl

So I’ve been on something of a diet for awhile now.

Turkey, fruits, vegetables, water, calorie-free soda, and coffee is basically what I live on. And it’s been working out for me.

But today, I had errands to run. No big deal. Except I skipped breakfast. Money in my pocket, nothing in my stomach. Bet you can guess how this story ends.

On my way back home, I saw a brand new, just-been-built Dairy Queen. Standing bold and enticingly. And I caved.

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