Stay in Control

So last night I prayed for humility. I knew it was a prayer that needed to be said because I prayed each word with a little bite.

Like my ego was saying, “I don’t need to be more humble. I’m perfect as I am and humility is for p-” and my spirit was like, “Shut the hell up, ego! I’m tryna keep us out of the eternal pit! *Clears throat* As I was saying Lord, help me to tame my arrogant ways.”

And, yes, I recognized the possibility that I may suffer from schizophrenia. But that’s irrelevant.

The point is, I’ve started telling myself, “no.” Yesterday I got home after work, ready to chow down on some lit sushi. But then I realized I wanted it too much. So I decided to fridge the food, shower, and straighten up a bit. Then ate.

Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control. (Proverbs 25:28)

It’s pretty empowering to feel in control of your own behaviors. Spirit leading the body and not the other way around.

Stay in control,


Shades of Gray

We laugh, smile, pretend it’s okay.

Like my trust you didn’t betray.

You text, “I care,” to my dismay,

I want to believe your display,

The gentle care bear you portray.

“Just for one night,” you ask to stay.

“I know you, though,” so I delay.

“Past is past, I’m different today.”

You come on soft, I start to sway.

Next thing I know, you’re on the way.

And I’m a feminine cliché,

Living my life in shades of gray.


Oh, Hamburgers!

a hamburger

photo credit: owen-wahl

So I’ve been on something of a diet for awhile now.

Turkey, fruits, vegetables, water, calorie-free soda, and coffee is basically what I live on. And it’s been working out for me.

But today, I had errands to run. No big deal. Except I skipped breakfast. Money in my pocket, nothing in my stomach. Bet you can guess how this story ends.

On my way back home, I saw a brand new, just-been-built Dairy Queen. Standing bold and enticingly. And I caved.

Continue reading